# 🧘‍♀️NOTES - MENTAL WELLNESS Allostatic load is "the wear and tear on the body" which accumulates as an individual is exposed to repeated or chronic stress. Drink a cup of water before your morning coffee to stay healthy and hydrated. Practice gratitude while you’re in the shower. - “So, as you shower, ask who or what am I grateful for today?" Stretch for 15-30 seconds before you get dressed. Book: Coping with Anxiety: 10 Simple Ways to Relieve Anxiety, Fear & Worry Things other than mindfulness and focused breathing that I do: walking, mediation/yoga, baths, and hand massaging (use the thumb of one hand and press around the palm of the other hand) Look up cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), common approach to treating anxiety (w/o medication), focuses on calming coping skills - google specifically CBT worksheets on anxiety Daily Mood Log http://jameslstolz.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Dailymood.pdf Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), an approach often used to help people with anxiety and depression Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT), an approach based on CBT that focuses on accepting and changing painful emotions. [Dialectical Behavioral Therapy](https://psychologytools.com/dbt.html) hand massage - Simply use the thumb of one hand and press around the palm of the other hand. It’s very soothing. mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT) Mindfulness-based stress reduction MBSR program MBSR is based on the following tenets: non-judging, non-striving, acceptance, letting go, beginner’s mind, patience, trust, acceptance, and non-centering ## DIRECTION Take stock. The first step is self-assessment. Do your research. Once you hold up the mirror, some jobs and careers will emerge. .. Develop an action plan. Once you identify a new career path, form an action plan. • Make connections and gain the experience.... Do a reality check. Take a personal inventory "What is it about my job that I do or don't like?" personal inventory of skills, values and interests pertinent The biggest mistake people make in career change is to follow the traditional 'plan then implement' model. You draw up lists of personal strengths, weaknesses and ambitions - perhaps with the help of a personality test. You then match your profile to particular professions and start sending out applications. But there's a problem: it typically doesn't work. You might get a new job, but despite your expectations, it is unlikely to be fulfilling. we can't learn carpentry by reading a book, we can't shift careers without taking practical action. Get out there and volunteer, shadow or take a training course, immersing yourself in experimental learning. If it doesn't provide a spark, try something else. Most people spend a third of their lives - or 90,000 hours - at work. Move to another city 🜎 NOTES - MEANING & MOTIVATION --------------------------------------- ## Self Care [Self-Care - Everything Is Awful and I'm Not Okay: questions to ask before giving up](https://www.aimeemaxwell.net/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/everything-is-awful-and-im-not-ok.pdf) * **Are you hydrated?** If not, have a glass of water. * **Have you eaten in the past three hours?** If not, get some food — something with protein, not just simple carbs. Perhaps some nuts or hummus? * **Have you showered in the past day?** If not, take a shower right now. * **Have you stretched your legs in the past day?** If not, do so right now. If you don’t have the energy for a run or trip to the gym, just walk around the block, then keep walking as long as you please. If the weather’s crap, drive to a big box store (e.g. Target) and go on a brisk walk through the aisles you normally skip. * **Have you said something nice to someone in the past day?** Do so, whether online or in person. Make it genuine; wait until you see something really wonderful about someone, and tell them about it. * **Have you moved your body to music in the past day?** If not, jog for the length of an EDM song at your favorite tempo, or just dance around the room for the length of an upbeat song. * **Have you cuddled a living being in the past two days?** If not, do so. Don’t be afraid to ask for hugs from friends or friends’ pets. Most of them will enjoy the cuddles too; you’re not imposing on them. * **Have you seen a therapist in the past few days?** If not, hang on until your next therapy visit and talk through things then. * **Have you changed any of your medications in the past couple of weeks, including skipped doses or a change in generic prescription brand?** That may be screwing with your head. Give things a few days, then talk to your doctor if it doesn’t settle down. * **If daytime: are you dressed?** If not, put on clean clothes that aren’t pajamas. Give yourself permission to wear something special, whether it’s a funny t-shirt or a pretty dress. * **If nighttime: are you sleepy and fatigued but resisting going to sleep?** Put on pajamas, make yourself cozy in bed with a teddy bear and the sound of falling rain, and close your eyes for fifteen minutes — no electronic screens allowed. If you’re still awake after that, you can get up again; no pressure. * **Do you feel ineffective?** Pause right now and get something small completed, whether it’s responding to an e-mail, loading up the dishwasher, or packing your gym bag for your next trip. Good job! * **Do you feel unattractive?** Take a goddamn selfie. Your friends will remind you how great you look, and you’ll help fight society’s restrictions on what beauty can look like. * **Do you feel paralyzed by indecision?** Give yourself ten minutes to sit back and figure out a game plan for the day. If a particular decision or problem is still being a roadblock, simply set it aside for now, and pick something else that seems doable. Right now, the important part is to break through that stasis, even if it means doing something trivial. * **Have you over-exerted yourself lately —** **physically, emotionally, socially, or** **intellectually?** That can take a toll that lingers for days. Give yourself a break in that area, whether it’s physical rest, taking time alone, or relaxing with some silly entertainment. * **Have you waited a week?** Sometimes our perception of life is skewed, and we can’t even tell that we’re not thinking clearly, and there’s no obvious external cause. It happens. Keep yourself going for a full week, whatever it takes, and see if you still feel the same way then. If you are so fucked you can't even think, or sleep, and don't know what to do, you can do this even while you're crying: clean the kitchen - even behind the appliances. --- For instance, even an empire's colonized victims possess choices: to submit to rule, to negotiate, to commit suicide, to resist nonviolently, or to counter-attack. How to keep going: A collaborator's guide https://68.media.tumblr.com/1b4bc8c18d9fc2944800827caac43779/tumblr_p3t9zupSMO1rjp5a6o1_1280.jpg [How to Get Motivated: A Guide for Defeating Procrastination](https://alexvermeer.com/getmotivated/) “In order to keep existential anxiety at bay, we must find and maintain perceptions of our lives as meaningful. We are a species that strives not just for survival, but also for significance. We want lives that matter. It is when people are not able to maintain meaning that they are most psychologically vulnerable.” The Stoic Philosophers recommend a technique called negative visualization to overcome this inherent adaptation to the pleasures of life and actually appreciate what we already have Some people think negative visualization is eerie because they think people who practice it are pessimists or that they are “calling for bad things to happen”. I don’t think that’s the case. For me, the realization that what you have (including your life) is ephemeral and that it might go away at any time makes me appreciate the present and the things I have so much more than if I just thought they’ll be there forever. 1. What am I taking for granted this week? 2. Who helps to keep the comforts of my life coming to me? 3. What systems are helping my life to run right now? 4. Three mundane things that I do almost daily that I’m grateful for. 5. Five utilitarian things I use in my life, why I’m grateful for them, and some of the factors and circumstances that help bring those into my life. Anomie & Weightlessness At the turn of the 20th century, French sociologist Emile Durkheim did an exhaustive survey to try to figure out what factors most influenced a country’s rate of suicide. What he discovered was that this statistic was most impacted by the presence in society of something he called anomie. Anomie, which literally means “without law” in German and French, was defined by Durkheim as a state of “normlessness” — the absence of shared rules, standards, values, etc. Norms provide a kind of gravitational force that can keep you grounded. Personal freedom without any such guideposts, standards, or expectations feels like being adrift in deep space. The weightlessness is sometimes exhilarating, but you lack any frame of reference for where you are: up and down, left and right are meaningless. Without “clear rules, norms, or standards of value” people feel anxious, rootless, confused, and even suicidal. Life in an age of anomie can often feel empty and meaningless. As an existential astronaut, you are charged with the task of creating your own rules, values, and expectations — your own personal meaning for the world. The U-bend of Life is the idea that people statistically get happier in their seventies, with the worst periods of depression ranging from our late twenties until about 46. This was dubbed “middle-age-misery,” born of all the anxieties and responsibilities of work, money, and family that tend to cluster around this time period. [A List Of 8 Core Values I Live By](https://dariusforoux.com/core-values/) ["vulnerability build friendships; ours sorrows have echos in others"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEg5_MaxFPo) ## 21 QUESTIONS TO ASK SELF 1. Am I happy? 2. Am I grateful? 3. Do I like my job? 4. Do I feel good? 5. Do I spend enough time on my education? 6. What new things am I learning? 7. Where is my career going? 8. How meaningful is my work? 9. What can I do that I'm currently not doing? 10. How can I get better at what I do? 11. What is the biggest pain point that our clients/customers have? 12. What is the ideal solution in the eyes of our clients/customers? 13. How can we give away more value without charging more? 14. Where can we reach our potential clients/customers? 15. How can we decrease our costs? 16. What’s my #1 priority right now? 17. How can I achieve my #1 priority faster? I 18. What tasks should I stop doing? 19. What tasks am I procrastinating? 20. What questions am I not asking myself? 21. How can I help one person today? See http://dariusforoux.com/21-questions/ When you learn, you feel like you are moving forward. When you are moving forward, you feel good. When you get better at what you do, you can make a bigger impact and solve bigger problems. ## Ikigai ikigai - “happiness of being busy.” what you are good at? what earns you money? what you love? what the world needs? https://informationisbeautiful.net/visualizations/ikigai-japanese-concept-to-enhance-work-life-sense-of-worth/ Autonomy, Mastery, and Purpose - autonomy is “the desire to direct our own lives.” - mastery is “the urge to get better and better at something that matters.” - Purpose is “the yearning to do what we do in the service of something larger than ourselves.” Remember to breathe. Don't let your thoughts overwhelm you. People can't read your mind. A midlife crisis is a transition of identity and self-confidence that can occur in middle-aged individuals, typically 45–64 years old. POLITICAL EMOTIONAL MATURITY "Kicking a machine with many intricate parts and complex malfunctions doesn’t fix it.” "Smashing your house won’t fix mine." "Your good fortune is the cause of my bad fortune." "The situation is so critical, only a massive, swift change can solve it. Big problems must have volcanic solutions." http://www.thebookoflife.org/political-emotional-maturity/ Don't be reliable only when it is convenient parable of polygons http://ncase.me/polygons/ What do you do? What could you do? What's stopping you? Don’t meet your heroes. it’s easy to make enemies of people we only read about Don't confuse confidence with competence Who will do what by when? That's an accountable plan. mental fortitude — the ability to quickly move past a poor performance, make adjustments and improve "No one should undertake a journey by car, or walk down the stairs or say goodbye to a friend without an awareness – neither gruesome nor unnecessarily dramatic – of fatal possibilities." [Pessimism is the cure for anger](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=coiCkmcKjX8) "The Helsinki Accords came out of a conflict-resolution workshop that relied on empathy exercises." -- confirm? The only way to fruitfully engage with someone who has different beliefs from you is to re-express their beliefs intentional self-awareness - long walks; talk to yourself motivation = (expectancy * value) / (impulsiveness * delay) https://lifehacker.com/the-important-habit-of-just-starting-1771016698 Communication Rules Everything Around Me (C.R.E.A.M.) selective attention 1) set your attention "What will I think about this a month or a year from now?" observe, hypothesize, predict, and experiment (test) = Learn, Build, Measure Elevator Pitch Structure “FOR (target customer), WHO HAS (customer need), (product name) IS A (market category) THAT (one key benefit). UNLIKE (competition), THE PRODUCT (unique differentiator).” ethos - credibility logos - logic pathos - emotion muda mura muri www.hugeinc.com/ideas/perspective/an-introduction-to-emotive-ui eight basic emotions--joy, trust, fear, surprise, sadness, disgust, anger, and anticipation The ten rules of negotiating * Get everything in writing * Always keep the door open * Information is power * Always be positive * Don’t be the decision maker * Have alternatives * Proclaim reasons for everything * Understand what they value * Be motivated by more than just money * Be winnable Life Lessons * Eyes, smile, questions * Talk to keep the flow * Introduce everyone as a superstar * Uninterrupt - Please continue * Don't complain * Campsite rule - Leave everything in better condition than found * Don't be an "energetic vampire" Data : the selective and possibly misleading use of data to support a decision that has already been made. People - Organization - Technology - Process a person so inessential and irrelevant that the world doesn't so much as bat an eyelash when they die. A hermit who spends his whole life alone in the woods, perhaps. Or someone who toils in utter obscurity, leaving no children and no other mark on the world. Pleasure + Meaning = Life Satisfaction Observe + Orient = Situational Awareness Evidence + Empathy + Persistence = Change Data that comes off a mechanical disk has a subtle warmth and presence that no solid-state drive can match Change minds thru EEP - Evidence Empathy and Persistence http://sethgodin.typepad.com/seths_blog/2016/07/the-flip-is-elusive.html nihilism and meaning http://www.meltingasphalt.com/a-nihilists-guide-to-meaning/ paul revere, williams dawes http://investorfieldguide.com/are-you-a-paul-revere-or-william-dawes/ http://www.vox.com/2016/7/14/12016710/science-challeges-research-funding-peer-review-process schwerpunkt (a word he borrowed from the German Blitzkrieg), or focal point of the loop. technical writing is a balancing act between precision, clarity and marketing nervous system is incapable of processing more than 110 bits of information per second creative induction - old fragments to form new mental concepts that more closely align with what we have observed is really happening around us ability to orient effectively is what separated the winners from the losers in any conflict John Boyd and Bruce Lee Boyd's seven core disciplines * Mathematical Logic * Physics * Thermodynamics * Biology * Psychology * Anthropology * Conflict (Game Theory) Three clusters of body language are of: * dominance/submissive behavior * comfortable/uncomfortable behavior * interested/uninterested behavior Shifty hands. “Acting Natural" How do you think you are doing? What else could I do to improve? Are you on track relative to your peers? What are your goals? When will you achieve your goals? What can I do to help? You don't have a roadmap Striving for perfection No time to unfocus chardi kala - enmity - the state or feeling of being actively opposed or hostile to someone or something. A common cliché is that we are the average of the five people with whom we spend the most time. 7 Tips for Turning Anger Into Hope 1. Accept it. 2. Pause. 3. Fear none, and instill fear in none. 4. Remind yourself to be optimistic. Repeatedly. 5. Surround yourself with positive people. 6. Be humble. 7. Take action. http://www.mashupamericans.com/issues/7-tips-turning-anger-hope/ decision-focused evaluation monitoring and evaluation (M&E) define a common problem that matters enough to work on collectively and identify a unique opportunity to solve it ## Empathy Theresa Wiseman’s four defining attributes of empathy * to be able to see the world as others see it; perspective taking * to be nonjudgmental; staying out of judgement * to understand another person’s feelings; recognising emotion * to communicate your understanding of that person’s feelings; communicating emotion https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=1&v=1Evwgu369Jw rarely can a response make something better what makes something better is connection "If you put shame in a petri dish, it needs three ingredients to grow exponentially: secrecy, silence, and judgment. " Patience is the foundation of nearly every good habit. umwelt: the assumption that our reality is the only reality out there; The key is when you appreciate the umwelt it gives you intellectual humility. Wait Five Minutes Before You Respond Force Yourself to Think from Alternate Points of View in Monotonous Situations "enclothed cognition" - self-perception based on clothing Conflict Resolution ## Dark triad interpersonal dominance, that is, those who are socially bold and assertive, the “dark triad”, namely psychopathy, Machiavellianism, and narcissism psychopathy refers to willingness to violate the rights of others, Machiavellianism to willingness to manipulate and use others, and narcissism to an inflated sense of one’s own importance and superiority. * narcissism * machiavellianism * psychopathy "no mind" (無心 mushin?), which encompasses the concepts of non-attachment, acceptance of change and fate as aspects of human life http://psychcentral.com/lib/15-common-cognitive-distortions/ Cognitive Distortions - Filtering - Polarized Thinking (black and white) - Overgeneralization - Jumping to Conclusions - Catasptrophizing - Personalization - Control Fallacies - Fallacy of Fairness - Blaming - Shoulds - Emotional Reasoning - Fallacy of Change - Global Labeling - Always Being Right - Heaven's Reward Fallacy Communication Rules Everything Around Me (C.R.E.A.M.) name blame claim name-blame-claim-loop http://waitbutwhy.com/2016/10/100-blocks-day.html Rules for Making Memorable Connections 1. Convey genuine appreciation. 2. Listen with intent. 3. Use humility markers 4. Offer unvarnished honesty. 5. Blue-sky brainstorm. honest, authentic, and reciprocal. How to argue * Use "I" only to give examples of when you used to do things wrong. * "You" belongs in positive sentences, as in, "You're way ahead of me on the use of pronouns." * Use "we" to establish buy-in. "We take on the hard tasks and get them done." * Attach "they" to every wrong opinion, attitude, concept, and way of working. https://www.buzzfeed.com/alisoncaporimo/argue-without-ruining-your-relationship?utm_term=.ikWMLqrR7#.cvYN5x6YE ## Regret Research suggests that around age 7, humans develop an ability for what’s called counterfactual thinking, the capacity to imagine what might have been. In one study, Americans list romance as a top source of regret, followed by family, education, career and finance. Imagine regret as the psychological version of physical pain Be Present. Listen Deeply. Speak Truthfully. Accept Fully. Interpret Compassionately. Forgive Often. Appreciate Vocally. Give Freely. Remain Unbiased. Love Anyway. The Problems of Philosophy by Russell | | | | | ------------ | ------------------ | ----------------------------- | | Metaphysics | Study of Existence | What's out there? | | Epistemology | Study of Knowledge | How do I know about it? | | Ethics | Study of Action | What should I do? | | Politics | Study of Force | What actions are permissible? | | Aesthetics | Study of Art | What can life be like? | | Logic | Study of Reason | | Metaphysics Study of Existence What's out there? Epistemology Study of Knowledge How do I know about it? Ethics Study of Action What should I do? Politics Study of Force What actions are permissible? Aesthetics Study of Art What can life be like? Logic Study of Reason [The Philosophy Book](http://gimnazija-osma-tbrezovackog-zg.skole.hr/upload/gimnazija-osma-tbrezovackog-zg/newsattach/872/The_Philosophy_Book_(gnv64).pdf) The core areas of philosophy are: * **Aesthetics** – study of the nature of beauty, art, and taste, and the creation of personal kinds of truth * **Epistemology** – study of the nature and scope of knowledge and belief * **Ethics** – study of the right, the good, and the valuable. Includes study of applied ethics * **Logic** – study of good reasoning, by examining the validity of arguments and documenting their fallacies * **Metaphysics** – study of the state of being and the nature of reality ## Big Five Personality Traits OCEAN * openness to experience (inventive/curious) vs. consistent (cautious) * conscientiousness (efficient/organized vs. easy-going/careless) * extraversion (outgoing/energetic vs. solitary/reserved) * agreeableness (friendly/compassionate vs. challenging/detached) * neuroticism (sensitive/nervous vs. secure/confident) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Big_Five_personality_traits psychographic modeling techniques Transparent, Honest, and Assertive Because authentic people have a strong sense of self, they do not perceive criticism as a personal attack and avoid passive-aggressive or manipulative communication styles at all costs. Instead, they are able to objectively evaluate negative and constructive feedback, identify what works, put it into practice, and leave the rest behind without developing hard feelings towards others. authentic people demonstrate gratitude and are able to live in the present moment in a thoughtful, mindful way. [The Basic Laws of Human Stupidity by Carlo M. Cipolla](ftp://ftp.ecn.purdue.edu/sozen/LAWS%20OF%20HUMAN%20STUPIDITY/The%20Basic%20Laws%20of%20Human%20Stupidity.pdf) * Law 1: Always and inevitably everyone underestimates the number of stupid individuals in circulation. * Law 2: The probability that a certain person be stupid is independent of any other characteristic of that person. * Law 3. A stupid person is a person who causes losses to another person or to a group of persons while himself deriving no gain and even possibly incurring losses. * Law 4: Non-stupid people always underestimate the damaging power of stupid individuals. In particular non-stupid people constantly forget that at all times and places and under any circumstances to deal and/or associate with stupid people always turns out to be a costly mistake. * Law 5: A stupid person is the most dangerous type of person. 15 habits of lucky people: 1) work harder 2) complain less 3) teach others 4) show gratitude 5) share credit 6) choose kindness 7) volunteer first 8) unselfishly give 9) trust first 10) good manners 11) stay teachable 12) promote others 13) love to explore 14) storytellers 15) love to compete Share as much information as possible Inject fun Meaning and respectfully NOTES - PHILOSOPHY & EQ ------------------------------- MARANA-SATI: Death Awareness THE INEVITABILITY OF DEATH 1. Everyone has to die. 2. Our life span is decreasing continuously. 3. The amount of time spent in our life to develop the mind is very small. THE UNCERTAINTY OF THE TIME OF DEATH 4. Human life expectancy is uncertain. 5. There are many causes of death. 6. The human body is so fragile. THE FACT THAT ONLY INSIGHT INTO DHARMA CAN HELP US AT THE TIME OF DEATH 7. Our possessions and enjoyments cannot help. 8. Our loved ones cannot help. 9. Our own body cannot help. “To be a truly happy person, one must contemplate death five times daily.” The practice, which Buddhists call “maraṇasati,” or death awareness, is supposed to help people embrace uncertainty and feel the spiritual urgency required to change your life for the better. Monks in some parts of Asia meditate over dead bodies to accomplish this. You can’t make people change. But you can create an environment where they choose to. unlabeled emotions often go misunderstood, which leads to irrational choices and counterproductive actions. In any conflict between two people, there are two sides of the story. Then there is the third story, the story that a third, impartial observer would recount. most respectful interpretation (MRI)- interpret the other parties’ actions in the most respectful way possible, giving people the benefit of the doubt. Hanlon’s razor: “never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by carelessness. fundamental attribution error, where you frequently make errors by attributing others’ behaviors to their internal, or fundamental, motivations rather than external factors General Recommendations https://hbr.org https://www.theschooloflife.com https://www.farnamstreetblog.com Feelings Inventory https://www.cnvc.org/sites/default/files/feelings_inventory_0.pdf ## The 40-Word Rule During difficult conversations, it’s important to be extremely concise. Aim to describe your observations, feelings, needs and requests in less than 40 words. Using more words suggests you’re justifying your needs, and this decreases their power. ## Non-violent Communication When ____[observation], I feel ____[emotion] because I’m needing some ____[universal needs]. Would you be able to ____[request]? Observations vs. evaluations Emotions vs. thoughts Universal needs vs. strategies Requests vs. demands Common universal needs that come up a lot in difficult conversations are: * Autonomy * Collaboration * Consistency * Clarity * Integrity * Recognition * Respect * Reassurance * Security * Support * Understanding ## Apology A real, effective apology has three parts: 1) Acknowledge how your action affected the person; 2) say you’re sorry; 3) describe what you’re going to do to make it right or make sure it doesn’t happen again. Don’t excuse or explain. Mono no aware (物の哀れ), literally "the pathos of things", and also translated as "an empathy toward things", or "a sensitivity to ephemera", is a Japanese term for the awareness of impermanence (無常 mujō), or transience of things, and both a transient gentle sadness (or wistfulness) at their passing as well as a longer, deeper gentle sadness about this state being the reality of life. ## Crossing Ethical Lines Three psychological dynamics that lead to crossing ethical lines. First, there’s **omnipotence:** when someone feels so aggrandized and entitled that they believe the rules of decent behavior don’t apply to them. Second, we have **cultural numbness**: when others play along and gradually begin to accept and embody deviant norms. Finally, we see **justified neglect**: when people don’t speak up about ethical breaches because they are thinking of more immediate rewards such as staying on a good footing with the powerful. **Radical candour** - Be humble, helpful, offer guidance in person and immediately, praise in public, criticise in private, and don't personalise be brief, specific, direct, and unapologetic **Vampiristic empathy** is a form of empathy where people want to manipulate the people they empathize with so that they can, through them, experience the world in such a way that they really enjoy it. Confessing error can also erode self-confidence: A study, published in the European Journal of Social Psychology, found that “people who refused to apologize after a mistake had more self-esteem and felt more in control and powerful than those who did not refuse.” Under conditions of stress and threat, our motives become short-term and selfish. We worry about whether others will like us, whether we’ll look good, be right, win, or avoid conflict. The key ingredient for the formation of friendships is repeated spontaneous contact 22 percent of millennials say they have “no friends” 27 percent said they had “no close friends,” 30 percent said they have “no best friends,” [Measuring empathy: reliability and validity of the Empathy Quotient](http://docs.autismresearchcentre.com/papers/2004_Lawrence_etal_MeasuringEmpathy.pdf) Empathy — the ability to tune into and share another person's emotion from their perspective — plays a crucial role in bringing people together. irritability — a reduced control over one's temper that results in angry outbursts — is listed as a core symptom of depression for children and adolescents emergent property of all the influences that have shaped you over your life https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emergence https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strange_loop Münchhausen trilemma Absurdism – Conflict between the human tendency to seek inherent value and meaning in life and the human inability to find any in a purposeless, meaningless or chaotic and irrational universe ensemble (also statistical ensemble) is an idealization consisting of a large number of virtual copies (sometimes infinitely many) of a system, considered all at once, each of which represents a possible state that the real system might be in. In other words, a statistical ensemble is a probability distribution for the state of the system You are a strange loop https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQsnHkfs3sA Alan Watts Essential Lectures Collection (1) Tao of Philosophy Not What Should Be Sense of Nonsense Coincidence of Opposites Seeing Through the Net Myth of Myself Man and Nature Limits of Language (2) Philosophies of Asia Relevance of Oriental Philosophy Mythology of Hinduism Introduction to Buddhism Eco-Zen Taoist Way Intellectual Yoga (3) Myth & Religion Images of God Jesus: His Religion Spiritual Authority Image of Man Democracy in Heaven Religion & Sexuality (7) Philosophy & Society Veil of Thoughts Divine Madness We as Organism On Being God Mysticism & Morality What Is Reality Comparative Philosophy Mind Over Mind Philosophy of Nature The Cosmic Drama Spectrum of Love Love of Waters Game of Yes and No The Smell of Burnt Almonds Spiritual Alchemy Eastern Wisdom Collection Ways of Liberation Introduction to Oriental Philosophy On Buddhism On Taoism Way of Liberation Introduction to Hinduism On Hinduism On Yoga (4) Religion of No Religion Journey to India The Middle Way Buddhism as Dialogue Religion of No Religion Wisdom of the Mountains Diamond Web Transcending Duality Eastern & Western Zen Introduction to Zen Early Chinese Zen Uncarved Block Zen Bones Biting an Iron Bull World As Just So Taoism Swimming Headless Wisdom of the Ridiculous Philosophy of the Tao Way Beyond Seeking Landscape, Soundscape Zen & Meditation Democratization of Buddhism The Controlled Accident Meditation Zenrin Poems Art of Meditation Why Not Now? Introduction to a Contemplative Ritual A Contemplative Ritual Extended Seminars Collection Comparative Religion Four Ways to the Center Worldly Religions Buddhism Net of Jewels Problems in Meditation Thusness World as Consciousness Zen Reconsidered Early Radio Talks Aldous Huxley Art of Psychoanalysis Bang or Whimper Bhagavad Gita Buddhist Mysticism Constitution of Nature Daylight Savings Fundamentals of Buddhism G.K. Chesterton Gateless Gate Ghosts Humor in Religion Laws of Karma Man is a Hoax Parallel Thinking Play & Sincerity Problems of Preaching Reconciliation of Opposites Return to the Forest Seeing Through the Game Study of Asia Symbolic and the Real Tribute to Carl Jung Un-Preachable Religion Human Consciousness Ecological Awareness Education for Non-Entity Nature of Consciousness Transformation of Consciousness Spiritual Alchemy The Psychedelic Experience The Psychedelic Explosion Turning the Head or Turning On The Arts Bushido The Importance of Space The Way of Tea The Future Future of Communications Future of Politics Future of Religion Time and the Future The Self Birth, Death and the Unborn Pursuit of Pleasure World as Play World as Self The Universe Individual and the World Power of Space Dystheism (from Greek δυσ- dys-, "bad" and θεός theos, "god") is the belief that a god is not wholly good and is possibly evil. The Existentialist’s Survival Guide one-two punch of Kierkegaardian faith and Nietzschean self-overcoming eudaimonia or human flourishing: faith, morality, and love “esurient desire for meaning pitched into a universe devoid of meaning” esurient = greedy vacant-eyed, empty suit of an individual “problem” of the unknown: decrease the amount of perceived risk or increase our tolerance for uncertainty. Human fallibility and individual psychology are not mere frictions that interfere with the smooth working of decision-making. They are inextricable from the human condition. Rooted as it is in phenomenology, existentialism is above all a philosophy directed toward conscious awareness, toward awareness of one’s freedom always to choose, whether it’s choosing how to act or, at the very least, choosing what to think. For Kierkegaard, it’s also about caring: “No matter how hopeless you might feel, Kierkegaard teaches, you still have a responsibility to reach through the pain and to care for and about others even if you find it hard to care about yourself” (p.232). Humility is about seeing oneself as the right size—not too big (overinflated ego), but also not too small (timidly pusillanimous). It involves (a) awareness: an accurate self-awareness of one's strengths and weakness, (b) openness: the ability to openly accept feedback and criticism while presenting your own views respectfully, and (c) empathy: an empathic concern for the well-being of other people. humility - the ability to take someone else's perspective and a genuine concern for the well-being of another person. Building empathy helps us cultivate humility. Before you respond, ask yourself two questions: (1) Why might other perspectives be right? (2) How would I respond if I treated the other person as if they were trying their very best? https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/meaning-making/202008/how-become-more-humble Kindness eases Change das nichts = nothingness das gerede = the chatter martin hiedegger more time in graveyards There’s no “positive” version of revenge Always value ethical actions over expedient ones. Zuibun kagaku ikasarete itadaite orimasu ne. = “I have been alive for a very long time, haven’t I?” Totally impossible to translate, but the nuance is something like: I have been caused to live by the deep conditions of the universe to which I a humbly and deeply grateful. P. Arai calls it the “gratitude tense,” and says the beauty of this grammatical construction is that “there is no finger pointing to a source.” She also says, “It is impossible to feel angry when using this tense.” — Ruth Ozeki (found in the Social Social Distance Club) Anger is temporary madness; Seneca thought that anger is a temporary madness, and that even when justified, we should never act on the basis of it because, though ‘other vices affect our judgment, anger affects our sanity In many Polynesian cultures, it is believed that a person's errors (called hara or hala) caused illness. "I love you." "Please forgive me." "I'm sorry." "Thank you." Khāmemi savva-jīve savvë jive khamantu me I ask pardon of all creatures, may all creatures pardon me. Mitti me savva-bhūesu, veraṃ mejjha na keṇavi May I have a friendship with all beings and enemy with none. "Hoʻoponopono" is defined in the Hawaiian Dictionary as: (a) "To put to rights; to put in order or shape, correct, revise, adjust, amend, regulate, arrange, rectify, tidy up make orderly or neat, administer, superintend, supervise, manage, edit, work carefully or neatly; to make ready, as canoemen preparing to catch a wave." (b) "Mental cleansing: family conferences in which relationships were set right (hoʻoponopono) through prayer, discussion, confession, repentance, and mutual restitution and forgiveness." [13] Reminder to ask yourself these questions • If I had 50M in the bank, how would my day-to-day change? • How will being anxious about this serve me? • Do I really need to answer this text or email right now? • Am I really happy? Or am I just really comfortable? • Am I really trying my best or am I just telling myself 1 am? • What is it that I can think of, read, watch, listen and talk about for hours on end without tiring of it? • If I had to describe who I wanted to be in 3 words what would those words be? • What would this look like if it was fun? • What would it take to snap me out of my bad mood immediately? • What's the first thing you think of when you wake up most days? • How do I want my life be different in one year? • Is this project making me a better person? • Am I doing this for myself or because someone • Am I doing/not doing this out of fear? • What are you in love with? Is that what/who you want to be in love with? • Would my 15 year old self think I'm the coolest?